T.G.I.Thursday

Thanks God for...

spring
warm weather
fresh rain
longer, brighter days
birds singing
rosey cheeks
camp fires
the motivation to get things accomplished
the ability to do what needs to be done
knowing that you take care of us
being able to cast my cares on you
getting time to be home with my kids and DH
having a business that allows us to be flexible and consider many opportunities
being able to put my hope & trust in you

Heavy Man!

Last Week: 166
This Week: 168
gained 2lbs, total lost 15lbs

Oh oh, it's starting already. I was afraid that I would gain back weight when I finished teaching and it's starting already! Sheesh.
I guess I better lay off the noodles and stick to my cup a soup lunch.
I also better get my pattooty out for a walk with the kids each day, drink more water, etc.
Better luck next week.

Take a peek in my fridge!

Here she is folks! The long awaited fridge!

Our old fridge conked out in Jan. For one reason or another it has taken us this long to get a new (to us) one.




Here are a few other things I liked a lot this week

This is pretty, and may be a way I can refurbish the cabinet that is in my ugly bathroom.

I love this idea for coralling crayons but keeping them handy to use whenever the mood strikes.

How am I FLYing today?

I'm trying to let go. I often equate my value as a person with the cleanliness of my home and the number of checks off my to do list. So jf any one has seen my home or my to do list lately, you'll know that I'm not thinking of myself as very valuable right now. I get angry and frustrated with my family & students because I want to blame them for not valuing me. In truth it is I who am making myself feel worthless. I have to let go of my expectations. It's easier said than done. If I am trying to do my best, that is all I can do. I can let go of the things that don't get done today, until tomorrow when I can attempt to do my best again. I need to simply work with what I've got, when I've got it. The trouble comes when I don't try my best, when I know I'm procrastinating, or avoiding an unpleasant duty. I get a yucky feeling, and I get angry and I look for someone to blame.

Is it truly possible to do your best all the time? So far I have been unable to maintain that standard every day. Is it acceptable to accept the idea that giving 50% now and then is ok? It seems to be an irresponsible idea, yet the desire to just drop a few things tempts me. I have dropped house cleaning many times in favor of reading a book or doing something fun with friends and family. I've chosen not to mark a stack of redundant sentences in favor of a few more hours of sleep. I've skipped the nightly snuggle and back scratch,when putting the kids to bed, in favor of a few minutes of blogging. Where is the line? What is acceptable to drop and what must be cradled with the utmost care? Where does my duty end and my off time begin? How can I be a servant of all, all the time?

I don't want to give up altogether. It is good to serve, it is good to be challenged, it is good to work hard. I guess what I'm grappling with is, am I doing enough to justify taking a break? Or am I being lazy and selfish when I pass by something I should do, in favor of something I want to do?

As with everything, I need to find a balance. Do a little here, do a little more there, take a break, have a drink of water, put my feet up, then get back at it. I love FLY Lady's saying, "house work even done incorrectly still blesses your family." That is a great motivator. I want to bless my family, and I don't have to be perfect to do it. If all chores can't be done, at least some chores can. It's ok to put my feet up now and then, but not ok to just quit altogether. Her baby steps mantra helps me keep going and doing the repetitive mundane thankless chores knowing that I can take a break when I need to.

So now that I've had a great little blog session, I'm off to clean up my kitchen. Then I plan to put my dear ones to bed and curl up with a good book.

T.G.

Thanks God for:

Teachers who love their students
Teachers who are passionate about the subjects or topics they teach
Administrators who aren't afraid to pray in front of their students and staff
Administrators who take time to know their students
Warm classrooms
Abundant school supplies
Electricity
White boards
Books
Paper
Pencils & pens
Libraries
Computers
Playgrounds
Grass fields
Well stocked gym equipment room
Abundant coffee, sugar & cream
Desks
Lockers
Photocopiers
Laminators
Microwaves
Hot lunches
Breakfast programs
Parent Volunteers
Custodians
Secretaries
Maintainance workers
Students who get involved
The opportunity for students to have free education

Sometimes I get a bit ungrateful when it comes to our education system, but when I open my eyes to what is available to the majority of the world I gasp at how rich and educated we are.
We often complain of low funding, or old buildings or burned out staff, but we have funding, we have a roof over our heads & heat, there are willing hands in each school dedicated to serving children. We know our system, school, and teaching strategies aren't perfect, but it is definately a lot better than what most have access to.

I have certainly gained a new perspective from my time in grade 6. Thanks God for making me grow.

Here's the skinny...

Last Week: 166lbs
This Week: 165lbs
1lb lost this week, 17 all together.

As I type this I'm on my second piece of staff room cake. Staff room food is always lurking, but since there is barely time to have a sqare meal when I'm at school, and since I'm still loosing, I'm going to call it celebration cake instead.

I need to devise a new plan this week, so that I'm ready to prevent myself from gaining all my stress pounds back when I finish work and return to SAHM duties. Any suggestions are welcome. My DH's advise is to eat less and exercise. Hmmm, I think I might need to be more specific, like eat less cake and more veggies. I'll get down to the nitty gritty next week. For now viva la gateau!

Take a peek at the "Spring" in our step

Spring run off in our valley

Playing in the mud

Our "villa on the lake"

The critters come out to play (and the bugs are starting to make their appearances too)

Friends come to visit our neck of the woods

Easter Egg Hunt at the Hildebrand Farm

Check out my red neck church ensemble. One should never be far from a pair of rubber boots when you live in Alberta in spring time.

Dade & Matia's first concert
We were guests of Krista & Eli (thanks guys!)

Sharon & Bram!!
I know I was way more excited about this concert than the kids. I grew up listening to Sharon, Lois & Bram and watching their t.v. program on CBC. I knew all the songs and I sang them out with gusto at the concert. I think I saw Dade hiding under his seat at one point. He spent the remainder of the time trying to convince me that we needed to go and get some food. Matia has an appreciation for "culture" and got into the spirit of things, even bravely going down to the floor and doing actions to one of the songs.

Skinamarinkinkydinkydink, skinamarinkydoo, I love you!

Matia in the mosh pit

A Sunday of Kite Flying & Cousins

Dade & Matia

Brooklyn

Becca

Samantha

Trevor the Dragon Tamer!

We've had a great April. Now that the sun is out, or at least the snow is gone, we've been able to get out and enjoy the great outdoors. In fact I even got a sun burn today! I guess I better crack open the SPF30 and soak up that Vitamin D. Happy Spring everyone, I'm off to bang off my rubber boots, swat some misquitos and put aloe vera gel on my forehead.

What you can do with an egg carton.

Cheap & easy crafts for kids here

I want to take baby steps toward: authentic worship, daily recognizing what is truly important in my life, serving my family & friends, and learning spiritual disciplines that will draw me closer to the heart of God.

I keep getting stressed out! I want to do a good job at everything, so I worry about everything, and then I just don't want to do anything, and start looking for ways out.
So what is truly important in my life?
Not the school field trip that I'm fretting about, but the students who are under my care and look to me to be an example to them.
What am I to be an example of? Faith, Hope & Love...
and so...
I've been praying about the difficulties I'm having planning this field trip and I have faith that I can do anything through Christ who strengthens me. I have hope that help is on the way(parent volunteers and angels to watch over us all and keep us safe!). Keeping things simple and straight forward will still provide a great time of fun with my students. I choose to be honored by this gift of time to spend with these students who I have come to know and care for. My last day with them will be this field trip, so instead of moaning over the work it will take to organize a class trip, I choose to apprecitate the time gift I've been given. I will try to focus on and look forward to the casual, easy time I can spend with my students, celebrating knowing them and this stetching, uncomfortable, learning experience we've been through together. I do love this noisey, sarcastic, slightly rude group of tweens, and all that they have done to change me and make me trust my God to work in my life and in theirs.

Thanks God

Thanks God for...

• time
• sunshine
• endurance
• good coffee
• sight
• fresh air
• hearty laughs
• hugs
• soft blonde baby girl hair smoothed under my palm and twirled in my fingers
• dimpled grins
• encouraging words
• answers to prayer
• unanswered prayers
• seasons in life
• nothing lasting forever except your love
• things to look forward to
• memories to cherish
• inspiring songs
• a forgiving husband
• good health
• a sound mind and good judgement
• the power of your resurection in my life
• problem solving skills
• interesting stories
• steadfast friends
• praying mothers

Weigh Day

Last Week: 168lbs
This Week: 166lbs
2lbs lost this week, 16lbs altogether

I thought I blew it over Easter because I ate a lot of chocolate. However, it seems that consisting on coffee & cup a soup at school over the last couple days has countered the effects of the chocolate. Only 4 more lbs to go and I will have lost the amount I wanted to lose before my sister's wedding. I will have to set a new goal if I'm successful.

Cool organizers

I love things that organize, because I am never organized. I always think if I had just the right organizational tool then it would keep me organized forever. Not so unfortunately, but I still perservere in my never ending quest. Here is something that is cute and functional. It's my first post for Take a Peek Tuesdays, and isn't it appropriate that I'm a day late!

FLY - Finally Loving Yourself

I've been a fan of FLY Lady since I was newly married. She has helped me to realize that perfectionism has many forms, and can wear a person down to utter despair. Before FLY Lady I would never have thought of myself as a perfectionist, because honestly, nothing I do turns out to be perfect. I've been known all my life as a bit of a messy, "big picture"person who doesn't dwell on details, easy going and fly by the seat of my pants kind of girl. I'm a huge procrastinator and tend to do my best work under pressure and at the last minute. I've learned that I procrastinate because of the fear of not doing something well. If I leave it to the last minute then I can blame my shoddy results on the fact that I procrastinated, not that I was incapable of doing a good job. Isn't it interesting the little mind games I play with myself. Any way, all this to say that I've learned a few ways to FLY (finally love your/myself). I don't want to think of myself as more important that I am, but usually this is not my biggest problem. My struggle is to remember that though I'm not perfect, I am being perfected as God works his plans in my life. I will never be perfect, but God's amazing grace and his sacrifice for my sins has covered my imperfections and give me freedom to simply do my best. I don't have to live in self disgust and self ridicule. I want to focus on ways to honor my savior with my life, and that includes acknowledging that if God loves me I truly am worth something. What does FLY Lady have to do with all of this? Well, she showed me "baby steps". Small efforts done daily to develop a habit. I want to take baby steps toward authentic worship, daily recognizing what is truly important in my life, serving my family & friends, and learning spiritual disciplines that will draw me closer to the heart of God. Though I've been a Christian most of my life, I feel like I'm lacking the closeness to Christ that will make all the difference in my life. So FLY Day Fridays will be about me examining my baby steps on my journey to follow God's will for my life.

Thanks God

Thanks God

• for encouraging words, delivered to me every day this week by a different person at my work.
• for warm weather.
• for kids who "huggle"me.
• for meeting my needs abundantly.
• for surrounding me with family and friends who love me.
• for new born babies.
• for grandparents.
• for good health.
• for modern conveniences.
• for a clever and handsome husband.
• for difficulties that have forced me to grow, change, applogize, think, endure and pray.
• for faith, hope & love.
• for my new life through your son Jesus.
• for forgiving me every day.
• for a soft bed.
• for a creative mind.
• for laughter.
• for tears.
• for rest.
• for work.
• for words and books and thoughts.
• for music and singing and praise.
• for peace in the midst of chaos.
• for time to try again.
• for triumphs.
• for failures.
• for sustaining me in any situation, even when I give up.
• for funny stories.
• for heart to heart chats.
• for abundant blessings.
• for conquering death.
• for choosing to love me.

Making My Home a Haven Monday

Ok, well the challenge this week is to set a good bed time for myself so that I am properly rested and hopefully not grumpy.
It's going to be tough, but I think I'm going to aim for 11pm. That is I'm putting down my book at 11pm, not climbing into bed to have a good read-a-thon into the wee hours. It is so difficult to have self control! We'll see how it goes.
My morning routine went ok, this morning. I was surprised to find the hardest part of my routine is praying. I was getting so distracted by other thoughts. My prayer life is so weak, maybe that is why my faith is kind of bipolar! Hmm, something to think about and to work on.
I hope the kids liked my cartoon notes on their breakfast this morning. I wish I could have been there to see them. At least they know I was thinking of them.

Making my home a Haven? My Home?

Well I came across something that may help me in the area of apathy towards my home. We shall see if this challenge helps get me in a better frame of mind. The thing is, I'm going to have to modify slightly, since I'm at work all day and I think this is a site for SAHMs and Homeschoolers. Worth a try I say. This is the first week's challenge.
So, morning routines huh?
Well usually I get up at 6:30, get into the clothes I laid out the night before, turn up our furnace so the noise masks my sounds and prevents me from waking up the kids. Brush teeth & hair, put on make up and then leave home around 6:45am. When I arrive at school I have an instant oatmeal and a cup of coffee then I check my plans for the day and do photocopying. So what should I add or take away from my mornings to make my home a haven? Here are some of the ideas I will try:

1. Leave "I Love You" notes for my DH & kids
2. Set out breakfast so it's ready when everyone else gets up.
   
3. Feed the dog on my way out so DH doesn't have to later.
4. Spend time on the way to work praying for our days

Can't quite think of 5, any suggestions are welcome. Here it goes...

Shallow

I'm feeling shallow today.
I'm not motivated to do anything, though I know there is always much to do.
That centrifugal force of selfishness pins me to my chair. I don't serve, I don't pray, I don't praise, I don't reach out. I just sit back and allow the waves of apathy wash over me.
From something as small as knowing I should use my time wisely to accomplish all my daily tasks, to knowing I need to submit my will again and again to my God and King. I do neither. I know I can do, be and go, yet I don't, am not and stay! I don't want my life to be wrecked by any "outrageous" obedience. I don't want to give up my comforts to be blessed immeasurably by my heavenly father who created me and has a plan for me to prosper!
I don't want to be judged. I just want to squeak by.
What is wrong with me!!!!!
How do I overcome?
I'm immature, ignorant and in denial. I don't really want to search my heart or be shown the wicked ways in me. So I curl in on the wickedness and try to hide it or excuse it.
I don't think my life reflects what I say I believe. The only thing I can be glad about is, that gives me a terribly uncomfortable feeling! That discomfort gives me hope.
I think I've mentioned before, my aversion to growing, stretching, and learning. I hate the uncomfortable feelings it brings. I hate feeling like I don't know what is happening, or what is going to happen. My inflated ego thinks I can predict and control the future, what a joke! What a lie! I have moments where I can glimpse the comfort of uncertainty; where letting go of trying to be in control releases me to be, do and go where I might not have otherwise. Those are good terrible (not terribly good) moments.
I suppose in a way I can be thankful for this evening of wasted time, since it has caused me some discomfort and soul searching. Though I had no desire tonight to face my shallowness, acknowledging that apathy has caused me to dig a little deeper, inspired me to look a little closer, and challenged me to keep casting off the selfishness that is holding me captive.

That Was Fun

Thanks C & M for your inspiration to revamp my blog. I'm still not sure I'm sticking with this set up, but I do have fun redecorating. Since I'm not doing much in the way of overhauling my home (like I should be) I can freshen up my blog world instead. Your helpful hints came at just the right time. I was starting to shy away from reading really interesting blogs because they had a similar set up as mine. What a strange little narcissistic brain I have huh?

I'm still having a great holiday (with a small niggling worry in the back of my mind that I really should be preparing lesson plans for the next month of school). I've been devouring the Harry Potter Series, very fun. Cleaned up my house a bit. Enjoyed visiting some friends and looking forward to seeing a few more before the week is up. I went shopping for my kids and also got new glasses for me. I've enjoyed cuddling, tickling, feeding, and even disciplining my small ones. I've had fun relaxing with, talking to and helping my "big one". I'm caught up on my blogging, facebook and MSN correspondence, and I've happily ignored the stack of dishes staring me down in the kitchen. Life is good.

Spring Break

I'm loving being at home this week! The sun is shinning, the kids are happy (mostly), my DH is madly fixing things for us while I'm home to watch the small ones. I'm getting lots of uninterrupted blogging time. Life is good.

Lunch was a hit today here's what we had. Just because it was in a "special" container the kids sat quietly and lapped it up. I ate the left overs.

My house is still messy because, well, I'm on holidays! Ha. So now that it is nap time I better stop blog reading and get something done. What I'd really like to do is finish Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire.... maybe if I get my dishes done before the kids wake up.

We're all looking forward to going to Auntie D's house for a BBQ today and playing with the cousins. I love spring! I love being at home! I am feeling revived and refreshed. I can definitely make it through another 3 weeks of teaching now. What a good feeling.